A Lonely Night

Things have been a bit interesting for me lately. I’ve sort of integrated into a new group of friends. I’ve had a lot of knew experiences. And I’ve been much happier overall. I haven’t had a bad day in Weeks. Having friends in person actively supporting me, and trying to help me has been really great.

Although I’m about to go out of town for the weekend and everyone seems to have gone out to do things, and left me here alone. No one invited me along, and people barely talked to me all day. I’ve always felt like I was sort of observing the group from the outside – like I have a backstage pass to all their happenings but I’m not a full member. It’s nights like this that make me feel that way. Everyone took off except for one of the friends, but they sent a girl back to pick him up, so I’m the only one that got left out.

I’ve told that guy how I’ve felt. He said that I’m not and he sounded very convinced but there’s still always moments like this. Moments where, despite the fact that I live with them, that they go do things together without inviting me. It wouldn’t be so bad except that these five guys are my only close friends. They’ve become like my family and this is my home, but right now it’s a very empty one.

I wish I could spend time with my friends before I’m gone for a weekend. Even though that’s not a long time I’m still going to miss them a lot. I’m still working on my issue with getting dependent on people. I feel like I’ve made progress but moments like this still get me down. I really don’t like being alone. It was ok when I was alone most of the day but all day and all night is too lonely for me at this point.

 

Quick note to anyone who emailed me. Sorry for the late reply, I did just answer. Always feel free to email me again, everyone.

Advertisements

3 responses to “A Lonely Night

  1. Sorry that happened, Theresea. That sucks. I hope your weekend trip is enjoyable, though. Also nice to know you’ve got some supportive real life friends.

    • By the way, I read through girl.T. It was surprising how closely your experiences paralleled stories I’ve heard from other people in transition.

      I thought I remembered reading you were planning on making a sequel to girl.T. Did that ever go anywhere?

      • Thank you.

        And kinda. I put T2.0 on pause when I moved into the dorm along with pretty much all my projects but I guess now that I got my computer in my dorm with me, I’l be starting it back up again.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s