Thank you to everyone who left comments or told me in private not to quit. You make it very hard to leave. So I won’t. But I am not back yet. In the mean time I thought you’d like to hear what I’ve been up to:
I was surprised how bad I managed to mess up my relationship. I fell into a depression and my partner looked through my blog to find out what was wrong. She saw the post I made about online cheating. Then she went snooping to find out who it was. Then she found out some other things. One that really hurt her was that I am in love with another woman (though I never intended to do anything about it). She broke up with me. Now we are just friends/roommates.
Got through Gender and History at the same time. Got a B in Gender just because I slacked off. Barely passed history. And I think the reason is that I developed a crush on the smart guy in class so I studied harder so I wouldn’t look stupid in front of him. Otherwise I might have failed. I talked to him a couple times but nothing happened.
I went to therapy for 10 sessions. I found it to be varying levels of helpfulness and one time that felt borderline harmful. I took a break for finals and it remains uncertain whether I’ll go again.
To fight off the depression I’ve been working on various projects. Including starting to learn how to draw by doing a web comic/visual novel called girl.T. I find that art is a really great way to cope with depression. Every time I get sad my pages look better (I think) and they take less time to make. I’ve been depressed for a lot of the last month.
I gave up on presenting male at school. Or presenting anything ever. I’m a girl and I let my clothes reflect that in whatever way I choose whether or not my body decides to cooperate. So far, it’s worked out and I’ve only gotten a couple of funny stares.
Weird Skyrim play through. Maybe more incoming on that once I fully come back. Haven’t been playing much else. Finally did a second play through of No More Heroes 2. Now I am looking forward to a third sometime in the future though.